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Dublin: 9 °C Thursday 26 December, 2024

12 things that are now acceptable to eat for breakfast

IT’S CHRISTMAS!

IT’S CHRISTMAS AND you know what that means: our ideas of what constitutes a breakfast have been thrown out the window. There are no rules anymore. You can eat a deep fried Mars bar if you like and nobody will judge you.

Here are some acceptable Christmas breakfasts.

1. Garlic bread

If not now, when?

2. A Selection Box

The one time of the year that a Fudge bar constitutes a breakfast.

3. Celebrations

I hear that a few Bountys technically counts as one of your five a day. Coconut and all that.

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4. Biscuits

BUT NOT THE GOOD BISCUITS!

5. Ferrero Rocher

Because you’re worth it.

6. Thai crisps, guacamole and hummus

Sure look, it’s practically vegan.

7. Chocolate torsades

“Will I have porridge or a gooey chocolate pastry? Gooey chocolate pastry all the way, thanks.”

8. Pringles

“F**k it, it’s Christmas.” – everyone’s attitude to breakfast right now.

9. Terry’s Chocolate Orange

If you’re not having a Terry’s Chocolate Orange for breakfast, you’re not doing Christmas right.

10. Cheese and crackers

*horses into Wensleydale on fancy basil crackers”

It’s healthier than chocolate, right? RIGHT?

11. Prosecco

*clink clink*

12. Mince pies

Love ‘em or hate ‘em, mince pies are the *ultimate* Christmas breakfast.

Merry Christmas everyone!

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